Have you ever heard about divorce or experienced it? Does it happen in your family or somebody that you know? What would you feel if you are in this situation? Definitely, everybody would feel bad if this happen to their family as it can destroy the family life. Divorce is the lawful disintegration of marriage or the end of a current relationship or association. Divorce begins with two adults yet dependably winds up affecting the children in the greatest way. Most parents never try to consider how the separation will influence their children. Children are affected by separate in different ways. Generally the effect is negative. Today, disintegration or divorce of marriage is a common thing and being utilized as the path of least resistance when couples can never again concur. Separation has turned into a far from being obviously true point due to the loss of family structure and establishment. For a few people, the results of separation are obliterating, and for others, it implies opportunity (Schramm,2009). What does living “happily ever after” mean, when separate from rates proceed to increment?
One of the reason shown that divorce destroy family life is children become the victim. These situation happened due to they gain lack of guidance. As children are growing up, they need full attention from their parents. However, when thing such as divorce happened in a family, the attention is change directly to the parent’s issues instead of focus on their children. Lack of guidance, children of divorce are more likely to behave as social deviants. Specific findings survey by The Heritage Foundation are that these children are more likely to commit minor and serious crimes, run away from home, expel from school, smoke cigarettes, alcohol addicted, carry weapons, engage in physical fighting, and use marijuana and cocaine ( Vrouvas, 2010 ). In terms of emotion, children tend to change in behaviour. According to Robert (1988) children from divorced homes have more psychological problems than children who lost a parent to death. People who come from divorced family are almost twice as likely to attempt suicide than those who do not (Cohen, 1988). Children would feel abundance, betrayed, traumatic, stress and some others bad feelings. These children are also having many daily struggles of their own to cope with. They become bad in expressing their feelings and maybe hurt the others not on purpose. As the result, their relationship with the society would be disturb and abnormal compare to others. Therefore, lots of negative impacts face by the children as divorce happen in a family life.
Divorce also menaces family life by disrupting children’s lives, which make them lagging in academic achievement. It becomes harder for them to perform well in school and pursue higher education. Children find it difficult to focus on academic work with concentration because they having a deep friction that gives them a sense of self-doubt and uncertainty. These changes happened in the family may distract and prevent a child from completing assignments (Marcy & Schaffer, 2015). In addition, thinking about the divorce could cause disruption in a child’s concentration in the classroom. Students struggle to give priority or importance to studies as they did not living in a peace, harmony, and order in the home (Kalpakgian , 2015). Their mind are always disturbed by the anger, fears, and unease of the parents. Therefore, children are unable to think, reflect, memorize, and expert the subject matter of study as they fail to control and fortitude their mind. Not to forget, education need a sense of wonderment, the joy of learning, and a fascination. Divorce tremendously affects the soul of the child and empties it of eagerness, excitement, and exhilaration. Parents who involved in divorced have less time to supervise their child’s schoolwork or become involved in school activities (Vrouvas, 2010). At the end of the day, these children become a passiveness, listlessness, and dispassionateness and thus, they tend to do the minimum, show no strong dedication to learn by heart, and show no interest in any of the subjects in the school. Children also will score lower on tests of cognitive development, verbal reasoning and math and science aptitude. In the worst serious case, these parent did not even know and realize that their children might had drop out of the school or not even attend classes as they are focusing too much on the divorcement.
Last but definitely not least, divorce destroy family life by affecting the standard living and well-being of the children due to the loss of joint-income from the both parents. This situation is happening due to the living expenses single-handedly that has to manage by single parent. The changes of the family economy is the worse after a divorce, particularly for mother. In most cases of divorce, the mothers are usually the guardian of the child who most of the time has lesser earning capacity than the fathers. Researchers said that sole mothers with dependent children experienced difficulties combining paid work and family responsibilities with less support (Schramm, 2006). In this new are, it is not an easy job especially with a child because raising a child can be very challenging (Repya, 2018). A single parent may also have difficulty in coping with raising a family while working at the same time. As a result, there may be less time and attention for a child. Apart from that, children with a divorce parent will go through deprivation in comfort receive such as disposed towards undergo lower education achievement (Conolly, Pepler, & Craig, 2010 ). Most of the children with a normal family often attending extra class in order to gain extra knowledge or increase their understanding. On the other hand, children with a divorce family tend to unable to afford it as they need to plan their financial wisely or in the worse cases, they are not able to pursue their studies. Furthermore, children with divorced parents facing fewer opportunities. An “extra” opportunities such as music lessons, summer camps, sports, choir, and drama are frequently cannot experience by the children because of pinched finances. Not to forget, their health care are also not grantee. These financial crisis will make the children’s life become more difficult than what is expected.
In conclusion, divorce generally turns into a circumstance when two individuals who were once close, maybe even perfect partners, have turned out to be isolated. Maybe not isolated physically, but rather isolated regarding being rationally in agreement with similar objectives and similar destinations. Take everything into account, divorce absolutely bring destruction to the whole family especially negative impact to children in a short term and also in a long term. In my opinion, any marriage couples with vexed relational unions, particularly the individuals who as of now have child should attempt all way to influence the relationship to work. In conditions where separation could not be maintained a strategic distance from, parents ought to consider keeping the kid out of the contentions that happens between them. Children ought to be continually support that he or she is constantly cherished in spite of the separation with a specific end goal to keep away from the kid from building up a sentiment coerce that they had caused the separation.